A Long-Ass History of Time

It has been noted that Jake and Billy, your Authors, are in reality millions of light years across in size. It follows that, each minuscule motion we take, millions of light years pass, and entire species wax and wane into extinction, each of them assuming (if sentient) that the current shape of whatever we're doing (perhaps one of us typing) is and always has been the shape of the local universe. Also, every time one of your Authors completes this slow motion and successfully punches some object, millions of solar systems are destroyed and rendered neutron stars or supernovae.